Archive for April, 2009

April 20, 2009

on leashing my inner martha

i’ve been joking lately that i’ve unleashed my inner martha because of all the baking i’ve been doing.  homemade cinnamon rolls, fresh strawberry muffins, chocolate cookies…mmmm.  it seems like i’ve been pulling out the mixer at least four days a week, and eating the rewards daily.  i think it’s high time that i discover some self-restraint and tie martha’s leash a little tighter.  if only i could channel her ability to clean, decorate, craft, and organize.  that would me a much more gut-friendly habit.

April 17, 2009

if i'm going to rehab, i'm taking my friends with me ran a story today about why moms run the risk of becoming addicted to the internet.  according to an addiction expert,  many moms are addicted to blogs and message boards, and they use their web addiction “as a way to escape problems.”  the article also notes that these mothers point to their accumulating piles of unwashed laundry and poor hygiene as evidence of this harrowing dependency.

let me note a few things:

  • this article was brought to my attention by one of my “internet friends”  
  • my first reaction, albeit in jest, was “ha!  i am totally going to blog about this” and then i realized that i was probably missing the point of the article. 
  • i have not showered today.  i’ve been meaning to, but i haven’t figured out a way to waterproof my laptop.
  • laundry?  what laundry.  i don’t see any laundry.  let me climb up on top of this mountainous heap of dirty clothes to get a better view.   

but let me also say that i would not survive motherhood without the aid and support of my “internet friends”.  i would have gone crazy (okay, crazier) if not for the connections i made through message boards and online communities, and the girls i met online have become the most amazing group of real-life friends i’ve ever known.  call it an addiction, call it dependence, but i would be lost if not for the internet and the friends i’ve made because of it.  i may have dishes in the sink, dog hair on the floor, and laundry piled up to the rafters, but i also have an outlet for my thoughts, a means of connecting to other real-live non-toddler human beings, and the most amazing group of friends that a marginally-internet-addicted stay-at-home-mom could ever ask for.  do you think they have wi-fi in detox?

April 17, 2009

my little lovebug


i look at her everyday and i am awestruck by this little creature.  she is growing up so fast and it is so much fun to watch.  she talks, and runs, and laughs nonstop.  she loves her daddy and our doggy RuRu.  she gives the most amazing hugs and sweetest kisses.  she loves to dance and spin and swing and climb.  her love for nemo is borderline obsessive.  she is never more than a few steps away from her puppy and her blankie.  she’s a great sleeper, thank god.  she’s also learning to throw a kickass tantrum, gearing up for the terrible-twos, i suppose.  sometimes i cannot believe that she’s mine and i’m hers.  i’m a lucky, lucky mama.

April 14, 2009

after a long wait, my nephew arrived home from korea 5 weeks ago.  he’s adorable, and chunky, and absolutely lovely.  i want to smother him in barbeque sauce and eat his chubby cheeks.  i am so looking forward to watching him and avery grow up together.  


April 14, 2009

are they still accepting applications for mother-of-the-year?

8:02 am: begrudgingly surrender to my child’s wails of “mama, mama, mama.”  sleepily stumble to her room to fetch her from her crib.

8:03 am: pause to set the safety gate at the top of the stairs.  pat myself on the back for my supreme parenting skills.  good job, mom. 

8:04 am: turn on finding nemo, hand baby a box of dry cereal that happened to be sitting next to the bed.  thanks to my  late-night munchies, i can feed my child breakfast without even having to open my eyes.  ignore her cries for juice and hand her my camelbak bottle full of water.  

8:04.o1 am: close eyes, plug ears, pull covers over my head.  let child fend off hungry, cereal-stealing, face-licking dog on her own. 

10:28 am: realize too late that the loud THUD i just heard was the sound of my child landing on the hardwood floor after falling off of the kitchen chair

12:43 pm:  my child and my pseudo-child are listening to “wild thing” by tone-loc.  “but that’s what happens when body start slappin’ from doin’ the wild thing,” is probably not toddler-appropriate.  pause momentarily to wonder how and why this song is on my ipod, lament the fact that this is probably far from the most shameful song on there.

3:10 pm: decide that my child has proven herself fully capable of climbing down the stairs on her own.  neglect to stand below her on her descent.  watch in helpless horror from the top of the stairs while my child tumbles ass-over-teakettle all the way down to the landing.   

6:30 pm: a tube of yogurt, a bite of string cheese, three plain noodles, a handful (handful? yep. eww) of ranch dressing, and some sprinkles for dinner?  sure.  why the hell not.  

7:10 pm: child climbs on top of a table at a restaurant.  throws salt and pepper shakers on the floor.  laughs hysterically.  stifle my own laughter so as to not encourage this sort of behavior.  

7:12 pm: get kicked out of a buffet (!) restaurant for my toddler’s horrendous behavior.  epic fail.  okay, we didn’t really get kicked out but we did make a hasty escape before the staff could ask us to leave. 

8:10 pm:  shower time.  baby steps on my broken toe and i utter a stream of colorful vocabulary.  shrug my shoulders in defeat when she mimics me.  consider her future career as a sailor or longshoreman.

8:19 pm: remember that my child can now reach into the bathroom drawer with ease.  it’s probably wise to remove sharp objects and prescription drugs.  whoopsies.

8:31 pm: bed time.  no really.  go to bed.  now.  

8:33 pm: mmmm…  who needs a glass.

April 14, 2009

guess who's back in the mutha-f'n house

um…  maybe.  i’ve been thinking about stuff, and thinking about writing, and writing in old school (pen and paper, y’all) journals.  trying to figure out how much of my life i want to share, and trying to figure out my life in general.  thus, the hiatus.  but i’m ready to get back in it.  we’ve got transformations galore taking place over here in the hizzy.  new basement! furniture relocating, impending decorating, the possibility of turning our office into my dedicated craft space (can i get a HELLS  YEAH!) after i convince my husband that i really need a craft room.  more later.  it’s insanely late.   they baby just started crying.  i took my ambien well over an hour ago.  i should be comatose by now. zzzzzzoooooonnnnkkk